008

So rather than sleep this evening I have decided to deposit a few random thoughts/opinions herein that have been plaguing my brain for the last 30 minutes or so. A bit of explanation is due first I think. For the most part I am okay with the way things are in my life. I have a BA in a degree that is only good for writing and teaching. This could be better if I was actively writing or had a teaching certification… but hey, you know what? I'm educated. I have a job where I thoroughly enjoy my coworkers and a percentage of the customers. I have been working on a project that I am passionate about and if all goes well will bring me a career that I can both love and be proud of. I have really amazing friends and family that I know have my back and are either rocking out with me from time to time or looking on in mild amusement. I am back to living with the family, it sucks but it is unavoidable for the time being and I am working on attaining the money to be able to move. At this time of  the night my brain seems to enjoy bounding back to the idea of romantic relationships. I am not going to bore you with my theories and postulations as to WHY I am single, or expound on my feelings in this regard. That is something that I consider livejournal fare and I would rather not whine about it on here. I learned long ago that most people don't actually want to be subjected to that unless they specifically ask… or I have been drinking and the general mood is that of somberness and melancholia. As such the following is not about me, but just some ideas I think should be common if they aren't. They are things that I wish that I had realized back when I was in high school.

Anyhow the point I have been dancing around until now is my ideas concerning certain standard terms of dating. In this case I am referring to the notion of someone being "out of one's league". There was also like two other things I was going to ramble about but I managed to forget them while writing that tangent-laden intro and reading someone else's blog. The idea of "leagues" and the subsequent location of a person relative to said league is bullshit. At a certain time in our lives, I like to hope most of us come to this conclusion. If you haven't yet, then you have my condolences. It doesn't matter how physically different two people are, so long as there is confidence. A bigger guy or girl might avoid asking out someone that they have a crush on because they think their feelings couldn't possibly be requited by someone so pretty. Maybe they aren't big, maybe they just consider themselves to be outside the societal representation of acceptable beauty. If they are confident, then it doesn't matter. That is why in all those shitty teen movies you see the "loser" overcome their failings and get their desired person by the end of the movie. Admittedly this isn't always the case as sometime people are just shallow assholes, but they aren't really worth being with anyway. Everyone who reinforces the idea of "leagues" more often than not is just another person who lacks self-confidence. This was an idea that I had sort of formed in high school, but given my high school naiveté and lack of confidence I usually just listened when people spoke of "leagues". I think one of the other things I was going to rant about was along the same vein. A person's "type", which is pretty closely associated with "leagues". Our "types" are not defined by our appearance. We are not in control of whom we are attracted to. This is not to say that we are attracted to the same sort of person our entire lives. As we age the things we like change and attractions evolve. Another fairly common assessment I hope. I am certainly not as attracted to the same sort of women I used to be, just as I am sure you are not attracted to the same sort of person you used to be.

This is not to say ask out just anyone or accept just any date offer. If you like someone and want to ask them out, grit your teeth and be confident. In the grand scheme, you don't have anything to lose and everything to gain. If someone asks you out and they aren't necessarily the sort of person you would normally go out with, give em a chance anyhow. One date won't kill you and you might wind up really liking them. It could be time for your tastes to change, and you might regret the missed experience of trying something new. Depending on how you look at it, life is a series of experiences. Why not get the most out of it?

Wherein I Review Something 2

I have been a fan of Incubus since my sophomore year of high school. They have been one of my favorite bands for almost a decade now. They won me over, as I imagine they did most people, with Make Yourself. However it may be time for me to move on. I love Incubus, but I haven't truly enjoyed an entire album of theirs since A Crow Left of the Murder. Don't get me wrong, I really liked Light Grenades, but that was not an album I completely loved off the bat. There were good tracks, certainly, but the album in its entirety was not at the level I was used to. However I continued to listen to it over and over until eventually, much as lichen does upon a rock, Light Grenades grew on me. Next came their 2-disc greatest hits album Monuments and Melodies. To me it seemed kind of strange for them to put out a greatest hits album. On the one hand they had been putting out albums for 10 years, so they had technically earned it I guess. Though I always assumed that bands only put one out closer to 20 years and maybe signaling the end of their career together. The first disc was, with the exception of two songs,  entirely composed of singles. These are songs that I really enjoyed, so I didn't mind that. However those other two songs and indeed the entire other disc were all unreleased tracks. If I said that they were all gems I would be lying. There were some good songs, sure… and it would be unfair of me to assume that every song that they wrote would really appeal to me. Unfair or no, this was sort of what I was used to. I really liked Incubus. However these songs were just really hit or miss. With the exception of Pantomime and an acoustic version of the previously released A Certain Shade of Green, I don't really find myself going out of my way to listen to these unreleased tracks. This may change of course, but not right now.

Today I purchased their new album, If Not Now, When?, their first album since their post-M&M hiatus. I've listened to it once through and I have to say… I'm just not digging it. The case may be that, much like with Light Grenades, I just have to listen to it more for the songs to really take hold and sink in. The only song that I think really stands out is the same song that they have picked for their first single off of it, Adolescents. It was the only song that I have noticed thus far to contain a similar, if not the same "feel" of the older Incubus tracks. I'm really hoping that after further listenings the rest of this album will grow on me. I never wanted to be the guy who went around talking about how things used to be back in the "good ol' days" and I also don't like the idea that I have changed so much as a person that the very thing that Incubus is no longer appeals to me.

Final verdict: I remain optimistic that I might like it eventually, but right now not so much.

Wherein I Review Something 1

I have been promising to do this for some time now, so here it is:
My review of University Plaza.

(intro note)Admittedly I have only myself to blame for panicking when my potential roommate opted not to return to NIU. Had I thought about it rationally I would have simply signed up for another official school dorm or just gotten an apartment by myself.

Services available. So UP offers both a staffed kitchen, as well as internet and a computer lab. The problems with the staffed kitchen and the computer lab are timing. UP caters to both students of NIU and Waubonsee Community College. I can't speak from the experience of the latter, but as to the former… NIU offers classes all day. This can mean quite a varied schedule for the average student. However rather than hire a couple extra people to keep the things open for those people who happen to have time to kill between the hours of 10-11am or 1-4pm (or in the case of the lab 11-5pm) they are closed. This leaves any students with restrictive schedules to have to go spend additional money on food elsewhere or compete with some class that is using the only public computer labs in the english departments because the school doesn't care enough about it's English department to give the computer-based classes their own labs. The need for such access to the dorm's lab is paramount when one does not own a printer or doesn't feel like dealing with their standard 64k dialup wifi. It could be argued that I should just stop whining and shell out the extra cash to pay for a printer or better internet. However as someone who is in school by the grace of the state and the funding it provided, I don't really need to be spending any more money. Another fun little tidbit is that despite the fact that the building has only 9 floors (counting the ground floor as '1' and not '0'). Yet the only stairs that I could find were for emergency use or staff use only. As a fat kid who doesn't want to be as such, I would have liked the option to take the stairs rather than the elevator. The condition of my room wasn't spectacular either. When I returned from Winter Break it looked as though the wand for the blinds had been ripped out of the contraption itself, a condition which was not present when I had left the month before. I also noticed over the course of the spring semester that a hole had developed in the ceiling. Apparently the window was pulling away from the ceiling. The heating/cooling unit was also a treat. Due to the setup of the system it could only ever pump out freezing cold air or smouldering hot air, with the control never actually in my hands. So on those warm winter days it would be sweltering and on the cool fall/spring days it would be freezing. I like using blankets and walking around in my shorts as much as the next oddball, but I like to have the choice. The last major bitching point has to do with the purpose of the RA's. In a situation like that, unless I really bond with the people (something that is more rare than I realized), I mostly keep to myself. It wouldn't have been so bad were it not for the mandatory meetings. I should not be fined for having better things to do with my time than sit around with a group of kids 6-7 years younger than me and be treated like I am away at summer camp.

On the plus side it was only a 7 minute walk to my classes.

Final verdict: Not for me. …then again I am a miserly old kook.

update: I guess they decided to keep 8 dollars from my security deposit because their building is falling apart. I didn't throw parties… I didn't wave around large unwieldy implements of destruction… I did not cause any amount of damage to the room. Logically I should have gotten the whole deposit back.

007

So my spring break just ended. My last one ever, unless I decide at some point that it is worth it for me to go for a Master's. Of course such an effort would probably need a lot of money, and I'm not sure what I would want to get it in. I love English, but to be honest I'm a bit burnt out on it. In any event, there are only two months left before I graduate and am just done. It seems really close. I have been in school for the better part of 20 years. The idea of no longer having school as a major part of my life is pretty intimidating to think about. No more green hair, no more snakebites... it is time for me to grow up. Time to get a second job and move out. To say that I am not terrified would be a blatant lie. And yet, the future doesn't seem quite so bleak. This is because of you. I am glad that I have been so fortunate as to have accumulated the great friends that I have in my years wandering about thus far. I don't feel quite as alone having you people by my side. Thank you everyone.

I want to make people laugh and get paid for it. Acting or writing would be ideal... both if possible. I have always dreamed big. It is the only way I know to be. I don't exactly know how I am going to make it happen, but it will. It may seem like a waste of time and just plain silly, but it is my life. It is all I have, and that is what I want to do with it. However if you guys wanted to join in, I wouldn't say no. We can make it happen.

Kate: Rotini sounds like a Pokemon.
Joe: Rotini evolves into Rotundo at 18 and Rotundo become Obesadra at 36. It dies before 40 though.
As it gets up in levels it has less to worry about from other pokemon and more from congenital heart defects.

006

So as of this entry I have managed to surpass my professional blog in entries. Even sadder is the fact that I managed to do in about a month what it took me over a year to achieve with that one. Anyhow... what follows is one of the entries that I had been floating through my head during that snow storm a couple weeks ago. Enjoy.

It may just be the uniqueness of my upbringing, but there are just certain aspects of society that I just don't understand.

Before I get too far into this, perhaps I should provide some background to myself. I am the child of mixed parentage who was raised for several years of my life on a number of different Navy bases. As such I was exposed to a number of different cultures and peoples. I was brought up with the ideas that people are all equal regardless of what they look like, what they believe, or who they are attracted to.

I have never really been able to understand how something like slavery could have existed. The idea that people have ever been discriminated against based on sex, appearance or religion just blows my mind.

To the original point, it makes no sense to me that the governments (state and federal) are having such a hard time accepting the idea that some men want to marry men and some women want to marry women. Firstly, it shouldn't be up to the government in the first place as marriage is technically a religious institution. This is why christian's get married in christian churches and jews get married in jewish temples and not variations thereof. I understand that there is the need for the marriage license, but isn't that really just for census purposes anyhow? Secondly are we still so backwards a society that we can't recognize that there is no harm to our precious society if we allow gay people to marry? Maybe it has to do with where I have spent most of my years, but it seems to me that every new person I meet knows at least two or three gay people. Politicians are really only doing themselves a disservice by ignoring what is apparently quite a large segment of society.

Unless of course I am mistaken and it is either much harder to separate one's religious beliefs from your public duties as an elected official. Or maybe I just imagined reading the idea that our forefathers set down and agreed upon about the separation of church and state.

I have no issue with people's beliefs so long as they don't try and force them on other people or impede other people because they happen to disagree. The world would be a much better place if we could all just work together for the common good of the species.

005

I have had a number of things wander through my mind in the time since last I posted. I sadly do not have the time in this moment to properly organize them into anything coherent but perhaps in the coming week I will be able to do so. It had been almost two weeks since my last entry and since I actually intended to keep my updates somewhat more regular this time, I thought I would post some things.

I bought a MacBook Pro as I said I would and I love it. There are so many things I had been planning to do that I can now that I have better equipment and software. Now if only I had a video camera...

I feel that one major issue that led to Orson Welles decline in the cinematic world, in addition to his having peaked too early with "Citizen Kane", was the fact that he was too dedicated to his personal aesthetic. There is nothing wrong with making truly deep, meaningful cinema that forces people to reanalyze their very being... but sometimes one has to pander to the masses. It is fairly well known that he had quite the ego and that probably didn't help matters. I understand these things all too well as I would prefer to make the deeper, more meaningful stories myself... but I also recognize that such stories don't sell nearly as well as the average cookie-cutter blockbuster or romantic-comedy. As the saying goes, "You can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs."

That shall have to be all for now.

004

So I have been meaning to be more regular with my updates, but the recent series of snow-tastrophes and ensuing chaos have been keeping me away from the internet. Thankfully I shall be getting a new computer of the mobile variety this week, so it should be a bit harder to keep me from airing random reflections.

I feel like its a bit cliché at this point to bitch about the recent weather, so I will speak my piece and move on. In pictures and through the window the sight of freshly fallen, pristine snow is something absolutely beautiful. Outside of that context however snow is cold, wet and miserable. My opinion on ice is similar, except that ice is also delightful for chilling one's beverage on a hot day.

Speaking of the computer thing.. in a few days I shall be purchasing a MacBook Pro. I know that there are those that think I am wasting my money. I have heard all the arguments for all of the various computers. Once upon a time, I probably would have cared too. I play video games. This should not be news to anyone that knows me. There was a time when I would have strongly preferred a PC. However in recent years I have become much more of a fan of console game, and that really eliminates my main reason for wanting a new PC. After a lot of contemplation over the last several months, I have decided that I want to get into the media development field. Ideally this is the sort of thing that I want to do. I know that Apple no longer really dominates the market for media development, but I am ready for a change of pace. Besides, it isn't as though I intend to get rid of my desktop PC. I intend to keep maintaining it and upgrading it as the need arises. It just won't be my primary machine anymore.

I feel like I am not alone when I say that I am sick and tired of the 3D fad. Every now and again its okay. Every few years for example. However not every single movie that comes out need to be in 3D. Especially as the only thing it achieves is driving up the prices and detracting from the overall movie viewing experience. That aside.. I kind of want a Nintendo 3DS. No glasses and a brand new version of The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time? Yes please.

Now to end it on a random note:
Companies with commercials that I have recently become overly exposed to and wish would die:
State Farm
Progressive
The General
5-Hour Energy

003

I have been debating whether or not I should bring my tablet to the dorm. On the one hand I could be drawing things and updating various sites with more recent art... and I could even make some visuals to go along with some of these blogs. On the other hand I'm not entirely sure how much time I would have to do such things... also that would be one more thing to have to take back after the semester is over. Hardly anyone has seen the dorm, but I have been trying to avoid moving things here because I am trying to keep the transport process simple. Once I actually have my own place it will obviously be a different story. Dorms are just too short-term.

002

So a couple of friends of mine have recently decided to give the ol' Weight Watchers a shot. Given my own tendency to go back and forth between wanting to lose weight and general love of all things full and flavorful, I have decided that maybe it is time for that pendulum to swing back the other way and see if it takes this time. I am familiar with the methods and system of Weight Watchers, having previously attempted it in a less than up and up fashion. At least two other people I know have done it and lost about 60 lbs, so it is clearly doable. I just need to work on the things that have always held me back... specifically when it comes to eating. It isn't that I eat too much, quite the opposite in fact. I usually forget to eat or wind up not doing so due to a certain lack of food in my dorm room. I have no fridge so anything I get has to be durable. Additionally I do at times forget to keep track of the relevant information for to make calculations. Anyhow I digress... I am thinking that at this point, what with so many other people doing it at the same time, perhaps my motivation with be better?

What can I say? It would be nice to have a hotter bod to go with this adorable face.

/vanity

Also.. I need to watch Sealab 2021 and Firefly again. It has been too long and I have really been jonesing them lately.

My Musical Misadventures Part 1

So last Thursday I went about getting ready for class in my usual way. I had just put on my coat and headphones when I noticed that sound was only coming out of the left side of said headphones. This is not an unfamiliar experience to me.. I have had the same thing happen before on a couple occasions. Usually this occurred when previous iPods were on their way out, and so I would just deal with it. In this case, the iPod was still relatively new and I was not looking forward to the prospect of replacing it. Given how many times this had happened in the past, I considered myself fairly knowledgeable. The running theory was that I must have plugged the headphone jack into the port wrong and accidentally damaged the connector.  I listened to it in its half-working state for the day and brought it with me to work as I normally do. However once I got to work I noticed that it had stopped making sound completely. This was very not cool. On my walk to work from the car I stopped by the Best Buy Mobile that I had bought it from and asked them if they knew of anything I could do to maybe fix it. They informed me that there was nothing that they could do, but if I were to bring it to an Apple store it could be taken care of as they have the tools for such things. Relieved at this news I went about my way and lived a very non-musical life for the next day. After class on Friday I had nothing going on, so I did as was suggested and took it to the Apple store in Oakbrook. They told me that there was nothing that they could do, but that there existed websites that could fix such things. Just on a hunch the guy tried his own headphones in my iPod and lo! The blasted thing worked! It turns out it was merely my headphones on the blink and not the iPod. In my defense, when this had happened previously with other iPods I tried other headphones, but to no avail. So they sold me some new headphones and I went on my way, bobbing my head to the music that was no longer exclusively in my head.

Take One

So the Oscar nominations are out and I managed to see all but 4 movies nominated for Best Motion Picture of the Year. Of those four I would have willingly watched "127 Hours", "The Kids Are Alright" and I guess "Winter's Bone" though I don't recall having heard of it. I can't wait for the various award ceremonies to be over because I can't wait to stop hearing about the fourth movie. I get it... "The Social Network" was well made and will continue to win several awards... but I really don't care. Firstly my distaste for Facebook and other social networks isn't exactly a secret. Secondly I am not a fan of Jesse Eisenberg. He comes across to me as Michael Cera with slightly more ability to emote. *shrug* Just not my thing. I really hope "The King's Speech" does well, it was a superb movie. Actually all the movies that are up for Best Motion Picture of the Year were pretty great.

001

This is technically my second blog and shall be of a much more personal nature. The other is more for my professional endeavors, so if that is what you are looking for then I suggest you go there.

I am an English major, but I am not the best at it. At times my grammar shall be less than perfect... but this is my personal blog and I do not write for perfection. I would point you here for my meaning: Bad Grammar. Stephen Fry puts it far better than I could.

This is going to be a short entry as I have to wake up for class in a few hours.